Voodoo Gaming Company

Most people will have heard of this game by now. But for those who haven't played, here are the rules.

The rules are, someone makes a wish, then the next person grants that wish, but with a horrible twist. After that, the wish granter proceeds to type in their own.

Example:
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Poster 1: I wish I had a million dollars.

Poster 2: You get a million dollars, but it's all in pennies.

I wish I had a car.

Poster 3: Congrats. You are the new proud owner of the worst piece of crap car in the world.

I wish that my wish wouldn't be ruined.

Poster 4: Granted. And now you're out of wishes!

I wish I had a girlfriend.
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And so on and so forth. You get to play the evil genie. Let's start.

I wish for a pet monkey.

Granted, but it's a zombie and tries to eat you.

I wish to stay clear of the monkey.

Granted, but now you must face human zombies.

I wish for a nickel.

Granted but it's liquid and in your hand

I wish for some more M&Ms

Granted, but I ate them.

I wish for a cool cane.

Granted, you get a large icicle.

I wish for more M&Ms.

Granted, but I ate them.

I wish for a wooden cane.

Granted, but it's rooted to the ground.

I wish for even more M&Ms (You're going to get soooo sick)

Granted, but you'll have to wait a few hours for the Boss to finish reprocessing them.

I wish for clear roads on the way to the folks.

Granted, you, along with all the other people, slide off the road.

I wish not to get those M&Ms back

Granted, but you'll starve to death!

I wish for a hippopotamus.

Granted but it crushes you.

I wish for some fries.

Granted, but it's fried worms.

I wish for pie.

Granted, but I ate it.

I wish for a pet sheep. :sheep:

Granted. No, really, granted. It carries it own curse and will ruin itself. You'll see.

I wish for more pie.

Granted, but it's old and moldy.

I wish for more sheep, I love 'em.

Granted, but they explode upon impact.

I wish I didn't need sleep

Granted, you're dead.

I wish for world peace.

Granted, but I ate it.

I wish for a cup of coffee.

Granted, I just finished reprocessing it.

I wish my toes weren't cold.

Granted, you have hooves now.

I wish to know how world peace can be eaten O_o

Granted, but your weak mortal mind implodes with such knowledge.

I wish to be able to manipulate time.

Granted, but you learn that time, being an abstract concept, does not actually exist

I wish to be able to cast spells

Granted, but there is no effect, so you just get a tired arm.

I wish to cast EFFECTIVE spells.

Granted, you set yourself on fire

I wish I could cast effective spells and be fireproof.